A duck walks into a bar… but you’ve probably heard that one, so how about a funny little story from my days as a barnacle scraper. Nelson Anderson was the boat-yard’s head boat-mechanic, and in his shop he had a mini-refrigerator, and in his mini-refrigerator he put his daily donut supply. But his donuts were disappearing. He tried but couldn’t catch the crook until finally he chocolate-coated a honey-glazed donut with Ex-Lax and caught his donut-thief brown-handed. I didn’t know about the Ex-Lax trap, but the day after it had been set, Kenny, a fellow yard-dog, came out of the bathroom and took me aside. “Rich, man, don’t tell anyone, man, I shit in my pants on the damn bus this morning.” I said, “What!” and cracked up laughing, then went around telling everybody I could find. When I told Nelson, he said, “Ah ha! Got him!” And I said, “What?” And then he asked me, “Can you keep a secret…?” When I saw Kenny later, I said, “Kenny, how the hell did you shit yourself? What’d you have for breakfast this morning?” He held his stomach with both hands and said, “Man, all I had was a damn chocolate-covered donut.” I kept Nelson’s secret for as long as I could, but it was a secret too good to keep for very long at all.
Calendar
- 2008-11-20 Fall play @ RBR - Romeo & Juliet
- 2008-11-21 Fall play @ RBR - Romeo & Juliet
- 2008-11-22 Fall play @ RBR - Romeo & Juliet
- 2008-11-23 Fall play @ RBR - Romeo & Juliet
- MSSB @ M Shanghai Den
Our monthly first Saturday gig. Awesome Schezwan food!
When: Dec 6, 2008 9:00:00 PM
Where: M Shanghai Den in Brooklyn,New York
Posted by:richardpetermorris
Watching
- Add Jim as your Netflix Friend
- Octopussy
- The Spy Who Loved Me
- Moonraker
- Licence to Kill
- The Man with the Golden Gun
- A View to a Kill
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- Bagelturf - An Aperture Workflow Example: Selecting 6 Images From 229 - excellent aperture workflow tutorial
- All Scientific Articles, Research, Landscape and Human Health Laboratory, University of Illinois - Human Health Benefits Of Natural Landscapes
- Natural Settings Help Brain Fatigue - Well Blog - NYTimes.com - Attention restoration theory suggests that walks in nature and views of green space capture our involuntary attention, giving our directed attention a needed rest.
- Jonathan Haidt on the moral roots of liberals and conservatives | Video on TED.com - Psychologist Jonathan Haidt studies the five moral values that form the basis of our political choices, whether we're left, right or center. In this eye-opening talk, he pinpoints the moral values that liberals and conservatives tend to honor most.
- Pollan's Proposals - For the time-strapped who didn't get around to reading Pollan's recent NYT's magazine piece on food policy, here is a great overview of that article.
- Multitasking Can Make You Lose ... Um ... Focus - NYTimes.com - As our minds fill with noise ? feckless synaptic events signifying nothing ? the brain gradually loses its capacity to attend fully and gradually to anything,
- Mayor promotes traffic-calming aids - To slow traffic and to protect children who walk to school, Mayor Pasquale Menna wants to increase traffic-calming measures and pedestrian crossings on busy access streets in the borough.
- Cities rethink wisdom of 50s-era parking standards - USATODAY.com - Officials hope that offering the freedom to forgo parking will lead to denser, more walkable, transit-friendly development.
- Scott Russell Sanders - Just read "A Private History of Awe." Wonderful book that resonated on so many different levels.
- Paris-Brest-Paris randonneurs go for distance - someday.

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if only there was a way to keep people from taking my beer.
That Nelson, such a trendsetter; in my town, the junk food capital, it’s hard to find a pack of donuts that isn’t coated with Ex-Lax anymore. Or cheese fries, either, for that matter.